Thursday, March 13, 2014

Living In An Apple Juice Hater's World

Me and my girl go to the grocery store. Mott's fresh pressed apple juice, $1.79 for a half gallon, that's a great sale, so we get eight bottles.  Eight bottles are on the belt in front of us. There's an old man and he's looking back, shaking his head like, "Nah. Nope."

And I'm like, "What wrong, old man? You mad  'cause we got all this apple juice?  'Cause you can go get some too.  It's over there in aisle four. But if not, stop judging us 'cause, hell yeah, we're hoarding this juice. Taking advantage of this sale before the store realizes what a horrible mistake they made.  And you know what? We're back here happy with our apple juice. You're up there lonely with your Hormel Chili, you lonely Hormel Chili eating old man."

It took me a minute to realize he wasn't shaking his head 'cause of the apple juice. He was shaking his head because my girlfriend was white and he didn't agree with that. But I was so caught up in the euphoria of having all that apple juice, that for like a minute I lived in a world where racism didn't exist. I was like,"It's obvious that this old man is just an apple juice hater.
-Hannibal Buress

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