Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Time To Deep Six These Phrases and Words

Baby Bump-The abdomen area of a pregnant woman. As the fetus/baby grows so does a woman's belly. Thus it is referred to as a "baby bump." (Urban Dictionary)

Babydaddy- The father of a woman's child, used to denote that the father is neither the mother's husband or boyfriend, but just the sperm donor. (Urban Dictionary)

Cougar- An older woman who frequents clubs in order to score with a much younger man. The cougar can be anyone from an overly surgically altered wind tunnel victim, to an absolute sad and bloated old horn-meister, to a real hottie or milf. (Urban Dictionary)

Man Cave- A room, space, corner or area of a dwelling that is specifically reserved for a male person to be in a solitary condition, away from the rest of the household in order to work, play, involve himself in certain hobbies, activities without interuption (sp). This area is usually decorated by the male that uses it without interferance(sp) from any female influence. (Urban Dictionary)

Most of these words and phrases annoy me because they are used by writers who want to show others that they are hip and with it enough to know the latest slang. My advise to them, grow-up; over a certain age you just won't be taken seriously if you pepper your writing with the current "in" words or phrases. Besides, once a supposed in word or phrase makes to print, television or movies, it is a good bet that it is already passe.

Babydaddy and Baby Bump, do not bother me that much but Cougar and Man Cave sure do since there is a lot of misogynist, anti-female, feeling expressed in their meanings. Cougar also has a strong whiff of ageism attached to it.

Whenever I hear or read the phrase Man Cave I get an image of Spanky and the gang sitting in their He-Man Woman Hating clubhouse telling each other how much they hate girls. That image makes me smile and, although I do find it annoying, I'm also kind of thankful that the phrase is out there. I know any man who uses it is probably an emotionally immature male who hasn't grown past the "girls are icky" stage of life and that is a valuable piece of information in work and/or relationship situations. Forewarned is forearmed.

"Cougar," a word that equates an older woman who is sexually active with a predator. Go up and read that Urban Dictionary definition again. Feel the disdain? No? Read the definitions for babybump, babydaddy, and man cave again. See the difference? Whoever wrote those definitions did not feel the need to throw in hateful descriptions of the subject matter.

And just in case you think this phrase only describes a certain type of older woman, here is an example of how the word has evolved to describe older women in general. This was at the bottom of Penny Parker's May 12, 2009 column in the Denver Post:


Two guys at Elway's Cherry Creek:

"Look at those two cougars working the bar."

"Oh, they're not just cougars. They're Chanel-wearing cougars!"

Unfortunately, Penny Parker doesn't tell us the age of the two women or just what they were doing but I will tell you the Elway's is a fancy restaurant and that waiting at the bar for a table is not that unusual. So, you probably have two older women talking to the people around them while they wait for their table or tables to be cleared so they can go into dinner being accused of "working the bar" by two men who resent them even being there.

Can't we all just show a little respect for one another and ourselves? Wouldn't it be nice if people stopped belittling other people just to feel better about themselves?

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