Thursday, October 31, 2013

Happy Halloween!

Remember, keep watching the skies!

More about Orson Wells's 1938 Halloween broadcast of War of the Worlds here.

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Car Talk

Do you know what your car is trying to tell you?

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Two Faced

One of the major political figures in the Republican's attempt to destroy Obamacare has been  junior Senator Ted Cruz from Texas.  He's had been in the news a lot since he read Dr Seuss's Green Eggs And Ham on the Senate floor during his filibustering attempt to get more Senators to vote for defunding the Affordable Care Act.  Until that movement Cruz wasn't even on my radar but when I first saw his face on the News I wanted to punch him right in the nose. That reaction hasn't changed.  I see him on television and, BAM!, I want to punch him in the nose.  It's a visceral reaction, Cruz's Face = Punch In Nose.  Then one day I figured it out.  My instantaneous dislike for the man is simply because he looks and acts like another political figure from the past.

The junior Senator from Texas, Ted Cruz:

The junior Senator from Wisconsin, Joe McCarthy:

Both political opportunists. Both cretins.

Monday, October 28, 2013

Thursday, October 24, 2013

A Woman's Work Is Never Done

Spent the last two days cleaning carpet. Beginning to feel like Jody Miller but with out the "French" maids or that Playboy centerfold on the bed (What the Hell???).

Up every day at six
Bacon and eggs to fix
Four kids from one to four
Pretty soon there'll be one more

I got old floors to wax and scrub
And there's a dirty old ring in the tub
I'll get a maid someday
But till then I'm
Queen of the house

No time to fix my hair
Need a new dress to wear
Old clothes will have to do
'Cause kids all need new shoes

I got bridge club each Tuesday night
He goes out with the boys and gets tight
But when the evening's through he comes a home to the
Queen of the house

I know the milkman, the iceman they come every day
They give me tips on the horses to play
And when I got the time to spare
I sit and wish that I'd picked a rich millionaire

I sing, up every day at six
Bacon and eggs to fix
Four kids from one to four
Pretty soon there'll be one more

Oh, but Sundays I'm mighty glad
We send the kids to his mom and dad
It's the day that makes me glad I'm
Queen of the house

Up every day at six
Bacon and eggs to fix
Four kids from one to four
Pretty soon there'll be one more

But Sundays I'm mighty glad
We send the kids to his mom and dad
It's the day that makes me glad I'm
Queen of the house

Queen of the house

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

How I Know Winter Is On The Way

10.  My husband has moved the snow blower from the shed to the garage.

9.    He has winterized the lawn sprinklers.

8.   He has put away the 15ft garden hose and replaced it with a short 3ft one.  This is so he can continue to hose the dogs off after their morning walk without worrying about ice bursting the longer hose.

7.   He put the insulated panels in the basement  windows

6.   He turned off the air conditioner and  turned on the heat.

5.  We put away some of our summer lawn furniture and covered the other pieces.

4.  We had our first snowfall last Friday

3.  The temperature has dropped below freezing on some nights.

2.  I put the winter comforter on our bed.

And the number one reason why I know winter is on the way?  Christmas stuff has been sitting along side the Halloween decorations at Target and Lowe's since the beginning of October.  

Monday, October 21, 2013

Friday, October 18, 2013

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

One Of These Books Is Not Like The Other, One Of These Books Just Doesn't Belong

How to Survive a Shark Attack
How to Survive in a Forest
How to Survive Frostbite
How to Survive a Plane Crash
How to Survive in the Desert
How to Survive a Polar Bear Attack
How to Survive a Flash Flood
How to Survive a Broken Leg
How to Survive an Earthquake
How to Survive a Forest Fire
How to Survive in a Whiteout
How to Survive a Zombie Invasion
How to Survive a Snakebite
How to Survive if Your Parachute Fails
How to Survive a Croc Attack
How to Survive a Lightning Strike
How to Survive a T-Rex
How to Survive Whitewater Rapids
How to Survive a Sinking Ship
How to Survive a Vampire Attack
How to Survive an Avalanche
How to Survive a Tornado
How to Survive Quicksand
How to Survive a Fall
How to Survive a Swarm of Bees
How to Survive in Space

How to survive a BFF Fight
How to Survive Soccer Tryouts
How to Survive a Breakout
How to Show You’re Sorry
How to Have the Best Sleepover Ever
How to Take the Perfect School Photo
How to Survive Brothers
Scary Survival Do's and Don’ts
How to Handle Becoming Rich
How to Keep Stuff Secret
How to Survive Tests
How to Survive Shyness
How to Handle Sudden Stardom
More Stardom Survival Tips
How to Survive a Camping Trip
How to Survive a Fashion Disaster
How to Teach Your Cat to Sit
How to Turn a No Into a Yes
Top Tips for Speech Making
How to Survive Embarrassment
How to Be a Mind Reader
How to Survive a Crush
Seaside Survival
How to Soothe Sunburn
How to Pick Perfect Sunglasses
Surviving a Zombie Attack
How to Spot a Frenemy
Brilliant Boredom Busters
How to Survive Truth or Dare
How to Beat Bullies
How to be an Amazing Babysitter

Monday, October 14, 2013

Americans Behaving Badly

From the Huffington Post article, World War II Memorial Barriers Pushed Through By Crowd :

"Sunday's rally was more political. A protest by truckers converged with a rally by a group called the Million Vet March at the World War II Memorial. Participants cut the links between metal barriers at the National Park Service site and pushed them aside.

Later some protesters carried memorial barricades to the White House and rallied outside the gates, confronting police in riot gear. Protesters carried one sign reading "Impeach Obama," and some waved Confederate flags

Yep, these "true Americans" thought it was a good idea to wave Confederate flags in front of the White House. A White House occupied by the first African-American president of the United States and his family. What a bunch of troglodytes.

Friday, October 11, 2013

With Apologies To Isaac Hayes

Who's the House Speaker here,
The one thinks he's got the public ear?
You're damn right!

Who's the man who would risk his neck
For his fellow Conservative?
Can you dig it?

Who's the cat that won't give in,
While we take it on the chin?
Right on!

They say this cat Boehner is
One bad Republ-
But I'm just talking about Boehner

He's a complicated man,
But no one understands him but his Party

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Wednesday, October 09, 2013

Tuesday, October 08, 2013

The Measure Of A Man

If you are over your head, how do you know how tall you are?
-T. S. Eliot

Right now the House Republicans think they are about 10 feet tall when they really only stand at about 3 foot 2 inches what with their refusal to vote on the Clean Bill. Here is Rep Paul Labrador explaining to Anderson Cooper why Republicans do not have to bring the Democratic Clean Bill to a vote. Why don't they? Because the Democrats do not have enough votes to win:

Cooper:Why not bring this to a vote in the House right now?

Labrador: You know, we could bring it to a vote and it would lose and you-- and the Democrats keep talking, and you know, this is a beautiful point the Democrats have is something they have no evidence that there is anyone will to vote for this--

Cooper: Why not see? Why not bring it up and see?

Labrador: But why should we? Why should we actually vote?

Cooper: Because that's the way things work.

Labrador: That is not how things work.

At that point the discussion got off track when Labrador accused Cooper of not liking Republicans and being a Democratic stooge (Well, not in those words but that is what he meant). Soon they got back on topic.

COOPER: But why not -- why not -- I guess what I just don't understand is if you're convinced it wouldn't pass, why not bring it up to a vote to take away that Democratic talking point?

LABRADOR: But why do it when you have a discharge petition right now the Democrats have been trying to put forth? Not a single Republican has signed that discharge petition. That's actual proof that there's not a single Republican that wants to do what the Democrats wanted.

COOPER: But wouldn't it make your -- but wouldn't it make your position stronger? Your argument about they're not willing to negotiate if you brought this up, let it not pass, and then --

LABRADOR: It's not necessary.

COOPER: And then that takes away their talking point.

LABRADOR: It's not necessary. When you have a discharge petition which, under the rules of the House, would force a vote on the house, not a single Republican has -- has signed that discharge petition. So their talking points are null and void.

Cooper: Congressman Labrador, appreciate your time. Thank you very much. Really do.

Now what is interesting about Labrador's last point is that earlier in the interview he said Obamacare was passed due to procedural tricks by the Democrats.

LABRADOR: So according to you the only election that mattered was the election of Obama. It doesn't matter that the House of Representatives in 2010 and 2012 actually won both times with majorities because we were fighting against Obamacare.

COOPER: Right. This has been passed by Congress. This law has been passed by Congress.

LABRADOR: That is not --

COOPER: I understand you don't like. You didn't run on it. But you ran on repealing it.

LABRADOR: No. Not a single Republican voted for it. Not a single Republican voted for it.

COOPER: It passed Congress, didn't it?

LABRADOR: The election of 2010 -- remember how it passed. It was through some procedural tricks. If you remember the Senate passed a bill -- one of the reasons Obamacare has so many problems right now is because they passed a bill in the Senate. That Senate bill was incomplete.

Bad, bad, bad Democrats for using procedural tricks to get what they want...wait, remember what he said at the end of his interview about why they don't have to vote on the Clean Bill?

LABRADOR: It's not necessary. When you have a discharge petition which, under the rules of the House, would force a vote on the house, not a single Republican has -- has signed that discharge petition. So their talking points are null and void.

Ohh, I see, only Republicans can win on what they call "procedural trickery". These people are shrinking right before our eyes. They keep this up and soon there will be no Republican party. Is that what they really want?

Friday, October 04, 2013

The Parable Of The Soda Machine

On my sister's facebook friend's page this morning:

So, Imagine that the company you work for held a poll, and asked everyone if they thought it would be a good idea to put a soda machine in the break room. The poll came back, and the majority of your colleagues said "Yes", indicating that they would like a soda machine. Some said no, but the majority said yes. So, a week later, there's a soda machine. Now imagine that Bill in accounting voted against the soda machine. He has a strong hatred for caffeinated soft drinks, thinks they are bad you you, whatever. He campaigns throughout the office to get the machine removed. Well, management decides "OK, we'll ask again" and again, the majority of people say "Yes, lets keep the soda machine." Bill continues to campaign, and management continues to ask the employees, and every time, the answer is in favor of the soda machine. This happens, lets say... 35 times. Eventually, Bill says "OK, I'M NOT PROCESSING PAYROLL ANYMORE UNTIL THE SODA MACHINE IS REMOVED", so nobody will get paid unless management removes the machine. What should we do???

Answer: Fire Bill and get someone who will do the fucking job.

Bonus: Bill tells everyone that he was willing to "Negotiate", to come to a solution where everyone got their payroll checks, but only so long as that negotiation capitulated to his demand to remove the soda machine.

Bill is a fucking jackass.

Thursday, October 03, 2013

Another House Republican Behaving Badly

Rep. Randy Neugebauer (R-Texas) shaming a US Park Service Ranger for trying to keep people away from the World War II Memorial on the National Mall.  The World War II Memorial, the Washington Monument, the Lincoln Memorial, the Jefferson Memorial, and all US National Parks are off limits due to the government shut down  

Rep. Neugebauer damn well knows this.

Wednesday, October 02, 2013

I've Got (Tock, Tock) Phssss, Steam Heat

I've got (tock,tock) fsssss, steam heat,
I've got (tock,tock) fsssss, steam heat,
But I can't get warm without your hand to hold.

-Steam Heat from The Pajama Game

Tuesday, October 01, 2013